This is a satirical, right-leaning commentary on the Clintons' Epstein connections, the Pentagon's laser weapon, and AI job losses, presented with irreverence and internet humor.

Woke AI company Anthropic is refusing to give the Pentagon full access to its technology citing 'ethics,' likely handing China an advantage while virtue signaling to woke investors; China wins again, God Bless America.

Netflix bailed on the Warner Bros. deal because they're broke and woke, paving the way for Paramount to scoop it up. Maybe this means less cringe content, but probably not.

Astronaut Fincke had a medical issue in space; NASA brought the crew home; conservatives roll eyes at inevitable woke takes.

The SOTU inspired the GOP to re-up its immigration stance, aiming to trigger liberals by advocating for border security and strict enforcement in the lead up to the midterms.

Democrat Cinde Warmington is challenging Kelly Ayotte for New Hampshire governor, promising a likely barrage of woke policies that could turn the state into a leftist dystopia. The chuds must remain vigilant.

Bergen's $29 million bike tunnel is a prime example of government waste and virtue signaling, especially when viewed in the context of global economic instability and the potential for cycling-related disasters.

A 21-year-old Air National Guardsman leaked classified documents on Discord, exposing the government's incompetence and confirming long-held suspicions about the Ukraine war and U.S. foreign policy.