HUNTSVILLE, Ala. – So, a NASA nuclear engineer, Joshua LeBlanc, spontaneously combusted in his Tesla last year. Happens all the time, right? Just another day in Clown World. The official story is that he drove his electric chariot into a guardrail and some trees, and poof, human flambé. Sure thing, government.

LeBlanc, 29, went missing, then reappeared as crispy critter in his Tesla. He worked on nuclear propulsion, you know, the stuff that could actually get us to Mars instead of virtue-signaling with woke space missions. But hey, who needs innovation when you can virtue signal?

His family smelled a rat, saying he was abducted. Left his phone and wallet at home. Convenient, right? They tracked his Tesla Sentry Mode data, which showed he spent four hours at the Huntsville airport the morning of his fiery demise. Plot twist: he wasn't supposed to be there. Wonder what he was up to? Probably just admiring the airplanes.

But wait, there's more! Turns out LeBlanc is just one of many scientists who've met untimely ends lately. House Oversight Chair James Comer is even raising eyebrows about a “sinister” pattern. Former FBI agent Nicole Parker noted missing cell phones and wiped data. Sounds legit.

And because everything is connected, an Iranian dude got busted for allegedly trafficking drones and weapons for Iran. This just adds another layer to the onion of conspiracy. Are these scientists being targeted? Is someone trying to steal our tech? Don't ask questions, just consume soy and obey!

LeBlanc worked on NASA's Space Nuclear Propulsion (SNP) program, which is all about getting us to Mars faster. He later became a team lead on NASA's Demonstration Rocket for Agile Cislunar Operation (DRACO), a nuclear thermal propulsion engine. Critical technology? Check. Potential targets? You betcha.

So, what's the truth? Probably something way more messed up than we can imagine. But don't worry, the government will tell you everything is fine. Just keep your head down, pay your taxes, and trust the plan!

Maybe it's time to start asking some serious questions and demanding answers. Or, you know, just keep binge-watching Netflix and pretending nothing's wrong. Your call, Patriot.

Sources:

* Alabama Law Enforcement Agency * NASA * KLFY