ORLANDO, Fla. — So, NASA's pushing the moon landing back to 2028. Again. Color me shocked. Remember when we were promised lunar bases by now? Instead, we get liquid hydrogen leaks and helium flow issues. Sounds like my last used car. Guess those billions of taxpayer dollars are really paying off. Maybe they should try duct tape and WD-40 like real Americans.

This whole Artemis program is starting to feel like a giant government jobs program disguised as space exploration. You know, a bloated bureaucracy where nobody gets fired, no matter how many delays they rack up. I bet half the people involved don't even know which way is up, literally. But hey, at least they're 'diverse,' right?

And don't even get me started on the private sector involvement. SpaceX and Blue Origin? More like SpaceBUCKS and Blue Origin$$. We're basically subsidizing Elon's Mars fantasies and Bezos's… well, whatever Bezos is doing these days. At least the Apollo program had a sense of national pride behind it. Now it's just corporate welfare in a spacesuit.

Administrator Isaacman says they're fixing recurring issues. Sure, Jan. That's what they said last time. And the time before that. Maybe instead of standardizing the SLS rocket design in 2028 (!!!), they should, I don't know, actually build a rocket that works consistently before 2028? Just a thought.

They're moving Artemis III to Earth orbit for 'rendezvous practice.' Translation: they realized they can't actually land on the moon, so they're faking it until they make it. Kinda like Biden's economic policies, but with more rockets. Associate administrator Kshatriya thinks this will 'increase momentum.' Buddy, the only thing increasing is my cynicism.

The claim that it's like the Apollo missions is laughable. Apollo was about beating the Soviets. This is about... what exactly? Feeling good about ourselves? Virtue signaling to the aliens? Making Kamala Harris feel relevant? Give me a break.

Increasing the workforce and transitioning contractors to federal workers? More government bloat. More union dues. More guaranteed pensions for people who can't even get a rocket off the launchpad. It's the swamp, just in zero gravity.

So, congratulations, NASA. You've successfully managed to make space exploration boring, expensive, and utterly devoid of any sense of urgency or national purpose. Maybe it's time to just nuke the whole program and start over. Or, better yet, just give the money back to the taxpayers. They could probably figure out a way to get to the moon faster, and cheaper.

Sources:

* National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA): [https://www.nasa.gov/](https://www.nasa.gov/) * Government Accountability Office (GAO): [https://www.gao.gov/](https://www.gao.gov/)