ICE Agent Dodges Dodge Charger of Doom, Commies Seethe
Illegal alien, allegedly a gangbanger, tried to turn his car into a weapon in California; ICE says 'not today, Satan.'

Patterson, CA – Another day, another illegal alien allegedly thinking he's above the law. This time, Carlos Ivan Mendoza Hernandez, a dude from El Salvador who's supposedly mixed up with the 18th Street Gang and wanted for questioning in a murder (big surprise), decided he'd try to play bumper cars with an ICE agent in Patterson, California. Spoiler alert: it didn't work out so well for him.
According to ICE Director Todd Lyons (who probably has a killer desk setup), agents were trying to bring Mendoza Hernandez in for a chat – a 'targeted vehicle stop,' as the suits call it. Turns out, Mendoza Hernandez was flagged by the National Targeting Center, which I'm picturing as a bunch of guys in a dimly lit room, chugging Mountain Dew and spotting bad dudes on CCTV.
Anyway, instead of politely surrendering to the Feds, our buddy allegedly decided to 'weaponize his vehicle.' Translation: he tried to run over an ICE agent. I'm no legal expert, but I'm pretty sure that's a bad move. Especially when the other guy has a gun and a license to use it.
So, the agents did what any sane person would do: they ventilated his ride. Mendoza Hernandez ended up in the hospital, which is probably not where he planned to spend his Tuesday. Details on his condition are scarce, but I'm guessing he's not feeling too peachy.
The FBI is sniffing around, along with U.S. Customs and Border Protection (CBP). The Sacramento field office put out a statement, thanking the Patterson community for their 'continued patience and support.' Translation: 'Sorry for the commotion, folks. We're trying to keep you safe from the hordes.'
This whole thing comes just months after that Renee Nicole Good incident in Minneapolis, where an ICE agent shot and killed a woman who was allegedly trying to ram them with her car during an anti-ICE protest. Remember that? The Left went ballistic. Called ICE a bunch of Nazis. Now, suddenly, they're real quiet.
Let's be honest, the Left will never admit that sometimes, ICE has to deal with some seriously bad hombres. They'd rather whine about 'human rights' and 'social justice' while ignoring the fact that illegal alien gang members aren't exactly model citizens.
So, here's to the ICE agents who put their lives on the line every day to keep this country safe. And here's to Carlos Ivan Mendoza Hernandez, who learned the hard way that you can't outrun the long arm of the law – especially when you're driving a Toyota Corolla.
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go buy a bumper sticker that says 'I support ICE.' Because apparently, that's a radical act these days.
Sources: * U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) press releases. * Federal Bureau of Investigation (FBI) statements. * The Constitution of the United States (for reference, Commies hate this). * Urban Dictionary (for definitions of 'no cap' and other useful terms).

