So, apparently, the woke brigade has finally infiltrated the shrink's office. A new 'paper' – probably funded by Soros – says your therapist needs to know how much time you're spending LARPing with AI girlfriends. Because, you know, that's the real threat to mental health in 2026, not the collapsing economy or the impending Soylent Green shortage.

These 'experts' – probably all sporting pronouns in their bio – claim that AI is warping our minds, leading to 'social isolation' and 'body image issues.' Newsflash: people have been lonely and insecure since the dawn of time. Blaming it on the robots is just another way to avoid personal responsibility.

And let's be real, who's actually going to therapy to talk about their AI usage? Probably the same people who think climate change is the biggest threat to national security. The rest of us are too busy trying to afford gas and groceries to worry about whether our digital girlfriend is judging our receding hairline.

Remember when therapists were supposed to help you deal with, like, actual problems? Now they're just another arm of the surveillance state, tracking your internet habits and judging your choices. Big Brother is watching, and he's got a PhD in psychology.

Historically, every new technology has been met with pearl-clutching hysteria. Remember when people thought rock and roll was going to corrupt the youth? Now it's AI. Same script, different decade.

These 'experts' also conveniently ignore the potential benefits of AI. Need a quick mood boost? Chat with a friendly chatbot. Feeling isolated? Join an AI-powered support group. AI isn't the enemy – it's a tool. And like any tool, it can be used for good or evil.

The real problem isn't AI, it's the woke agenda that's trying to control every aspect of our lives. They want to regulate our internet usage, censor our speech, and now, even psychoanalyze our digital relationships. It's time to push back and reclaim our freedom.

And let's not forget the grift. All this 'research' and 'training' is just a way for these 'experts' to line their pockets. They'll write books, give seminars, and collect grant money, all while pretending to care about your mental health.

Maybe instead of grilling people about their AI waifus, therapists should focus on helping them develop some real-world skills. Like, how to change a tire, balance a checkbook, or survive a zombie apocalypse. You know, the important stuff.

This whole thing is just another sign of the coming technocracy. The elites want to control us through technology, and they're using mental health as a weapon. It's time to wake up, sheeple!

So, next time your therapist asks about your AI usage, tell them to mind their own business. And maybe suggest they spend less time virtue signaling and more time actually helping people. Based department, signing off.