ROCK COUNTY, WI – Alright, folks, buckle up, because this one's a doozy. A Wisconsin mom, Tyiece Oninski, apparently decided that the best way to protect her daughter from…checks notes…Elon Musk, was to stab her to death. Yeah, you read that right. Stab. To. Death.

Now, before the left starts screeching about mental health (which, yeah, probably a factor here), let's be real. This is what happens when you marinate your brain in the woke juice box for too long. You start seeing Elon Musk under every bed, convinced he's going to steal your pronouns or something.

I mean, seriously, Elon Musk? The guy's busy launching rockets and triggering libs on Twitter. He's not personally out to get your teenage daughter. Unless, of course, she was planning to short Tesla stock. Then maybe he'd send a strongly worded email.

But stabbing? Nah, that's just straight-up crazy. And while we're at it, let's talk about the drugs. Benzodiazepines, amphetamines, and THC? Sounds like a typical Tuesday night in Portland. No wonder this lady was seeing space aliens and thinking Elon Musk was the Antichrist.

The real tragedy here is Kuren Rein, the 14-year-old victim. She didn't deserve any of this. But let's not pretend this is just a random act of violence. This is the result of a society that's gone completely off the rails, where people are more concerned with virtue signaling than personal responsibility.

So, what's the solution? Stop mainlining CNN, log off Twitter, and go touch some grass. And maybe lay off the recreational pharmaceuticals. Just a thought. The GoFundMe for Kuren's brother is over 17k, so at least people are coming to the rescue of those left behind. I'd say Elon should pay for it, but he would just be accused of triggering people with money.