MOUNTAIN HOME AFB, ID - Two Navy jets, victims of the Globalist American Empire (GAE), kissed the Idaho sky a little too closely at the Mountain Home Air Force Base airshow. No confirmed kills (yet), but the planes are definitely feeling the Bern – as in, burning metal. What in the name of BASED is going on?

Airshows: a glorious celebration of American air superiority, brought to you by the very same military-industrial complex that keeps Tucker Carlson up at night. Used to be a simple affair: fly high, fly fast, impress the ladies. Now? Probably some DEI officer is micromanaging the flight path, making sure there's 'equitable' representation of left turns and right turns. Can't even dogfight without woke interference these days.

Sources close to the situation (aka, some guy on Twitter) are saying the planes collided because the pilots were distracted by mandatory critical race theory training. I mean, makes sense, right? Hard to focus on avoiding another plane when you're busy deconstructing your own inherent white privilege. Or maybe the planes identified as something other than F-whatever and just wanted to be friends. You never know these days.

Let's be real, this probably wouldn't have happened if we still had pilots like Chuck Yeager at the helm. Now? We got pilots worried about microaggressions and preferred pronouns. The Air Force is too busy recruiting TikTok influencers to train real pilots. What a clown world.

The investigation will probably blame “pilot error” or “mechanical failure.” Translation: someone forgot to update their LinkedIn profile with their preferred pronouns and the plane got triggered. Or the auto-pilot went haywire when it detected a micro-aggression.

Of course, the libtards will use this as an excuse to defund the military even more. Meanwhile, China is building a new aircraft carrier every Tuesday. And we're worried about… airshow safety? Wake up, sheeple! The enemy is within!

This is what happens when you prioritize feelings over facts, diversity over merit, and pronouns over patriotism. Two perfectly good jets, gone to waste. Thanks, Obama!

Remember when airshows were just about explosions and bald eagles? Now it's all safety briefings and virtue signaling. What a joke.

We need to bring back the days of unapologetic American badassery. No more woke airshows. No more pronoun pilots. Just pure, unadulterated freedom!

In the meantime, I'm gonna go buy some more ammo and wait for the next shoe to drop. God bless America, and God save us from the woke mob!

Maybe this is a sign. Maybe it's time to unplug from the matrix and go live off the grid. At least the bears don't care about your pronouns.

And for the love of Pete Mitchell, can we please just have airshows with flyboys showing off cool maneuvers? Less woke, more afterburners.