Las Vegas, NV - Well, here we go again. CinemaCon happened, and the suits in Hollywood are drooling over their next round of soulless reboots and woke sequels. Get ready to choke down another heaping helping of nostalgia bait seasoned with progressive virtue signaling. They can't create anything original anymore, so they're just digging up the corpses of beloved franchises and slapping a fresh coat of woke paint on them.

First up, Avengers: Doomsday. Robert Downey Jr., back as Doctor Doom? Sure, why not desecrate Iron Man's legacy with a villainous turn? Expect heavy-handed social commentary and a preachy message about climate change or income inequality, delivered with all the subtlety of a hammer to the face. Chris Evans said he'd only come back if there was a real reason? Oh, I'm sure the tens of millions of dollars convinced him real quick. The trailer showed Gambit and Shang-Chi fighting... just wait for Gambit to come out as non-binary in the sequel. You know it's coming.

Then there's Top Gun 3. Because apparently, one woke-ified legacy sequel wasn't enough. Get ready for more diverse casting, intersectional storylines, and probably a lecture on the evils of toxic masculinity from Maverick himself. Tom Cruise playing a repentant oil baron in Digger? That's rich. Maybe he'll single-handedly solve climate change with his Scientology superpowers. Or maybe it's just another PR stunt to distract from the fact that Hollywood is still pumping out garbage that nobody asked for.

And let's not forget Focker In-Law. Because the world desperately needed another Meet the Parents movie, right? Expect plenty of awkward jokes, politically correct humor, and a whole lot of cringe. Ariana Grande playing the love interest of Ben Stiller's son? Sounds like a recipe for disaster. They will milk this franchise until the udders are bone-dry.

Even Christopher Nolan is getting in on the action with The Odyssey. At least this one has some potential, but don't be surprised if they shoehorn in some woke messaging about colonialism or gender equality. They can't help themselves. Hollywood is a broken machine, churning out the same predictable garbage year after year. Prepare for disappointment.