So, Silicon Valley Bank, the darling of the woke tech bros and social justice VCs, finally kicked the bucket. Turns out, virtue signaling doesn't pay the bills. Who knew? Now all the 'underrepresented' founders who hitched their wagons to SVB's DEI gravy train are suddenly screeching about how this hurts them. Color me shocked.

Arlan Hamilton, the head honcho at Backstage Capital, is out there playing the victim card, whining about how the SVB collapse is a 'tornado' hitting the 'smaller house' occupied by entrepreneurs of color. Maybe, just maybe, building your house on a foundation of virtue signaling and woke capital wasn't the smartest move, Arlan.

SVB was practically throwing money at anyone with the right skin tone and a half-baked startup idea, all in the name of 'equity.' They sponsored woke conferences, funded BLK VC's virtue-signaling 'State of Black Venture Report,' and generally acted like a walking, talking corporate social responsibility pamphlet. And now they're bankrupt. Coincidence? I think not.

Joynicole Martinez from Rising Tide Capital is complaining that SVB was the only bank willing to say 'yes' to their clients. Maybe other banks said 'no' for a reason, Joynicole. Perhaps those 'underrepresented' startups weren't exactly investment-grade material. Just spitballing here.

And let's not forget Asya Bradley, the immigrant founder who's suddenly discovered that not having a Social Security number makes it hard to get a loan. Welcome to America, Asya! Turns out, financial institutions tend to prefer borrowers who can actually be tracked down if they default. Who knew?

Look, I'm not saying that minority entrepreneurs don't face challenges. What I am saying is that SVB's collapse is a perfect example of what happens when you prioritize woke ideology over sound financial management. It's a disaster waiting to happen. The market doesn't care about your feelings, it only cares about profit. And SVB forgot that.

Now, all these 'underrepresented' founders are going to be lining up, begging for a bailout. They'll claim that the SVB collapse is a setback for 'diversity' and 'inclusion,' and that the government has a moral obligation to step in and save them. Don't fall for it. Let them learn a valuable lesson about the dangers of woke capitalism.

Seriously though, what's more hilarious than the entire woke brigade being caught with their pants down because their favorite woke bank decided to engage in woke banking and now woke people are now woke-ly sad? The level of irony would kill a normal person.

So, crack open a cold one, raise a glass to the free market, and let the tears of the equity grifters wash away the stench of woke nonsense. SVB is gone, and good riddance. Maybe this will be a learning experience for everyone involved.