Santa Rosa Island, California—aka one of those places where the elites go to 'connect with nature' before jetting back to their coastal mansions—is currently on fire. Ten thousand acres and counting. Zero percent contained. Turns out, even the 'Galapagos of California' can't handle a little heat, especially when that heat comes from a boater who apparently thought flares were just fancy birthday candles.

Here's the story: 67-year-old dude crashes his yacht (probably some hybrid monstrosity), etches 'SOS' into the dirt like he's f*ing Rambo, and fires off a couple flares. Coast Guard scoops him up, no problemo. Except… those flares might've ignited the whole damn island. Oops.

Now, the usual suspects are hyperventilating about 'rare plant communities' and 'ecological devastation.' Cry me a river. Last time I checked, nature was pretty good at, you know, natural disasters. This ain't natural. This is what happens when you let clueless yuppies play in a sandbox they don't understand.

Of course, the National Park Service is on the case, which means they'll probably spend the next decade writing a 500-page report about the 'impact of anthropogenic climate change' while the island turns into a charcoal briquette. Meanwhile, the dude who started the fire is probably sipping cocktails on his (new?) yacht, blissfully unaware of the ecological apocalypse he unleashed.

And let's not forget about the 'six dozen firefighters' risking their lives to put out this blaze. God bless 'em. They're probably the only people involved in this whole mess who actually know what they're doing. Bet they didn't sign up to babysit rich dudes who can't steer a boat.

But hey, at least the libs can virtue signal about saving the planet while ignoring the fact that their policies are probably making wildfires worse. Remember when California banned plastic straws to save the turtles? Yeah, well, those turtles are probably choking on smoke now. Thanks, Gavin Newsom!

So, what's the takeaway? Maybe we should stop letting idiots play with fire. Or maybe we should just let the island burn and build a golf course. I mean, who needs rare plants when you can have a sweet 18-hole course with ocean views? Think about it. (Don't actually think about it. I'm being sarcastic. Mostly.)

In conclusion, another rich Californian has demonstrated how to turn a minor inconvenience into a raging inferno. He is a menace. Lock him up. Or at least make him plant some trees. Preferably Torrey pines. Extra credit if he does it while wearing a 'I Heart Mother Earth' t-shirt.

This whole debacle is yet another chapter in California's ongoing saga of environmental mismanagement. Between the droughts, the fires, and the endless regulations, it's a wonder anyone still lives there. Maybe it's time to just declare the whole state a national park and let nature take its course. (Except for the parts with the golf courses.)