Okay, so the perpetually aggrieved Parent Voice Project (funded by Soros, probably) dropped a report titled 'How Schools Work for Every Child.' Translation: how schools aren't bending over backward enough for your precious little angel. The big reveal? Parents of kids with alleged 'special educational needs and disabilities' (SEND) but no education, health, and care plan (EHCP)—basically an IEP on steroids—are the least satisfied.

Well, duh. Of course, they are. Entitlement is a hell of a drug. These are the same parents who think their kid's 'unique learning style' means everyone else has to adjust. Newsflash: life isn't fair, and sometimes you just have to suck it up, buttercup. The survey, involving a whopping 6,000 parents (out of, what, millions?), found that a measly 57% of the un-IEP'd whiners rated the quality of education as 'high or very high.' The horror!

Meanwhile, a glorious 68% of parents with the coveted EHCP gave a thumbs up, and a respectable 71% of parents of normal kids were happy. This proves, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that IEPs are the ultimate participation trophy—guaranteeing satisfaction regardless of actual educational value.

Our fearless leader, Bridget Phillipson, announced plans to reduce the number of these gold-plated EHCPs by 2035. Cue the shrieking. Apparently, limiting bureaucratic bloat is now a crime. These people are literally advocating for more paperwork and government intervention. They're basically socialists in disguise.

The report also bleats about 'inclusive education.' The goal: cramming every kid, regardless of ability, into the same classroom. Sounds like a recipe for disaster. Imagine trying to teach calculus while Timmy's in the corner eating paste and banging his head against the wall. Sure, Timmy gets 'included,' but everyone else suffers.

The survey helpfully points out that only 52% of parents think teachers have the 'right tools' for SEND. Shocking. Maybe instead of demanding more resources, these parents should, you know, parent. Take some responsibility for their own spawn. But that would require actual effort, wouldn't it?

One Weston-super-Mare mom (Weston-super-Mare, where dreams go to die) complained that there was 'no thought' given to her kid before a 'crisis.' Translation: she didn't bother to intervene until things blew up. Reactive parenting at its finest.