Alright, folks, buckle up, because the Lefties are at it again. Portland, that bastion of sanity (citation needed), has decided that what this country really needs is more legal protection for polyamorous relationships. Because, you know, that's the burning issue facing the working class right now, not inflation, illegal immigration, or the impending economic collapse. Nope. Polyamory.

They’re calling it “inherent worth and dignity.” I’m calling it a Tuesday in Clown World. Apparently, if you can't decide between Chad #1 and Chad #2, the city should step in and make sure your housing and job prospects aren't affected. Makes sense.

According to the ever-reliable Pew Research Center, the nuclear family is fading faster than Biden's cognitive abilities. Only 37% of Americans 25-49 are living the ol' Leave It To Beaver life. Translation? The Left's social engineering is working, and traditional values are taking a dirt nap. Cue the sad trombone.

Diana Adams, some lawyer from the Chosen Family Law Center, wants to “unbundle” rights from traditional relationships. Translation: she wants to blow up the entire legal framework that's been in place for centuries. Taxes, health insurance, hospital visits – all up for grabs. Because nothing says 'stable society' like completely dismantling the foundations it was built on.

Brett Chamberlin from the Organization for Polyamory and Ethical Non-monogamy (OPEN) is pushing this garbage in cities like Seattle and Detroit. He dreams of a future where states and the feds embrace polyamory. I dream of a future where gas is under $2 and politicians aren't bought and paid for by corporations, but hey, we all have our fantasies.

We got Amy Nash-Kille, a polyamorous poster child, praising this absurdity like it's the second coming. She lived with two dudes and raised kids. Good for her? Maybe. But don't expect the rest of us to celebrate the destruction of traditional family structures.

The real kicker? They frame this as some kind of civil rights victory. It's not. It's a manufactured crisis designed to undermine everything that made this country great. While actual civil rights are being trampled, the woke mob is hyper-focused on issues that affect a minuscule percentage of the population. Distraction 101.

So, there you have it. Polyamory is the new hotness, traditional families are out, and the Left is doing victory laps. Don't worry, though, I'm sure this will all end well. Just like everything else the Left touches.