PORTLAND, Ore. — Okay, folks, we've officially hit peak clown world. Oregon's education system is such a dumpster fire that a literal pencil is running for governor. I'm not even kidding. J. Schuberth, a guy who clearly has too much time on his hands and a serious bone to pick with the commies running this state, has donned a six-foot-tall pencil costume and is telling people to write in 'Pencil' on their ballots. And honestly? He's got a point.

Our fourth-graders are DEAD LAST in reading. Dead. Freaking. Last. You know, the people who are supposed to be teaching them to read are failing so hard, a yellow #2 with an eraser is more qualified to run the state.

Schuberth, the dude inside the pencil (it's a metaphor, people), is a former college professor and literacy advocate. He's been watching Oregon's education system circle the drain for years, thanks to the Dem supermajority's woke garbage and teachers' unions. So he said, 'Screw it, I'm gonna become a pencil.' Based.

Look, we all know 'Pencil' isn't gonna win. But the sheer absurdity of this campaign is the point. It's a giant middle finger to the politicians who are ruining our schools. It's a desperate cry for help from a state that's drowning in progressive policies gone wrong.

Governor Kotek is seeking another term, and honestly, she's probably laughing her ass off at this. But maybe, just maybe, if enough people write in 'Pencil,' she'll realize that Oregonians are fed up with the woke agenda and the constant stream of failures coming out of the education system.

The best part? Even if 'Pencil' gets a ton of write-in votes, the state probably won't even count them unless they exceed Kotek's total. Classic. They'll do anything to bury the truth and keep the gravy train rolling.

Schuberth is trying to get images of the ballots so he can count the 'Pencil' votes himself. Madlad. He's basically doing the job the government should be doing. Remember when elections were free and fair?

So, yeah, a pencil is running for governor. It's ridiculous. It's hilarious. But it's also a wake-up call. Oregon's education system is a joke, and it's time we started taking it seriously. Or, you know, just write in 'Pencil.' What have you got to lose?

At this point, electing a sentient pencil might be an upgrade. At least it won't be pushing CRT on toddlers. #PencilForGovernor #MakeOregonReadAgain #ClownWorld