Oh, the irony. Jodi Kantor, the New York Times reporter who made her name taking down Harvey Weinstein, has now penned a self-help book called How to Start. Apparently, exposing sexual predators wasn't enough; now she's on a mission to guide Gen Z through the existential dread of finding a career in the post-Trump, woke-ified world. You can't make this stuff up.

Apparently, it all started when Kantor gave a commencement speech at Columbia University, that bastion of free speech and intellectual diversity (insert sarcastic eye roll here). The students, bless their hearts, weren't interested in Israel, Gaza, or Trump. No, their burning question was: "How do we find our life's work when everything feels so broken?" Peak millennial angst, am I right?

So, Kantor, fresh off a battle with breast cancer and an empty nest, decided to put her investigative skills to the test…by writing a career guide. Because, you know, taking down Hollywood moguls is basically the same as helping zoomers navigate LinkedIn. Makes perfect sense.

The book promises to be "short and punchy," full of "practical and wise advice." I'm sure it's chock-full of gems like "follow your passion" and "network, network, network." Groundbreaking stuff, really.

Let's be real, though. Gen Z is screwed. They're saddled with student loan debt, facing a gig economy where job security is a myth, and bombarded with woke propaganda telling them they're either victims or oppressors. A self-help book from a New York Times reporter isn't going to solve any of that.

But hey, at least Kantor can pat herself on the back for trying. And who knows, maybe a few trust-fund babies will find their calling as organic kale farmers thanks to her sage advice. The rest of us will just keep grinding, hoping to survive another day in this dumpster fire of a world.

So, go ahead and buy How to Start. It'll look great on your bookshelf next to your copy of Sapiens and your Bernie Sanders campaign poster. Just don't expect it to magically transform you into a fulfilled and successful human being. That's what therapy is for…and copious amounts of booze.