Washington D.C. - Looks like NPR finally learned that virtue signaling doesn't pay the bills. The perpetually woke media outlet is downsizing its newsroom with layoffs and buyouts after Congress finally grew a pair and defunded them. Turns out, when you spend all your time lecturing Middle America about their privilege, they stop wanting to foot the bill for your lattes.

Remember last summer? Congress finally said 'enough' to the gravy train of federal subsidies for public media. NPR, which relies on that sweet, sweet government cash, is now feeling the pinch. They're crying poor because they're $15 million short, which is roughly the amount of avocado toast consumed by their staff in a year.

Editor-in-Chief Tommy Evans, bless his heart, sent out a weepy memo about saying goodbye to his comrades. Boo-hoo. Maybe if they spent less time pushing woke narratives and more time reporting actual news, they wouldn't be in this mess.

Of course, NPR is trying to spin this as some kind of attack on journalism. But let's be real, they're an echo chamber for left-wing talking points. Taxpayers shouldn't be forced to fund a propaganda machine that actively hates them.

They got a $33 million anonymous donation, which is hilarious. Probably from some coastal elite who feels guilty about driving a Tesla. But that's just a band-aid on a gaping wound. Eventually, they'll have to learn to survive in the real world, like the rest of us.

CEO Katherine Maher is trying to put on a brave face, talking about how generous donors have been. Yeah, but donors get tired of throwing money into a bottomless pit. Especially when that pit is filled with critical race theory and gender studies lectures.

Among those taking the golden parachute are some real NPR lifers. Don Gonyea, Vickie Walton-James, and Joe Shapiro are all heading for the exits. Good riddance. Maybe they can find a new job lecturing college students about the evils of capitalism.

Even the science correspondent, Nell Greenfieldboyce, is getting the boot. She's trying to be all philosophical about it, but let's be honest, it sucks to lose your job. Maybe she can start a podcast about climate change... funded by George Soros, of course.

This is a victory for taxpayers who are tired of funding woke nonsense. NPR needs to learn to adapt or die. And if they die, honestly, nobody will miss them... except maybe a few NPR tote bag-toting liberals.

In the end, NPR is a victim of its own success. They got too comfortable pushing their agenda and forgot that they were spending other people's money. Now they're paying the price. Maybe this will be a wake-up call for other media outlets that think they can get away with alienating half the country.