Welp, another one bites the dust. Memphis Grizzlies forward Brandon Clarke is reportedly dead at 29. Confirmed by the team, his agency, and the NBA. No word on the cause, but you KNOW the woke brigade is already gearing up to blame systemic racism, toxic masculinity, and the patriarchy. As if personal choices don't exist, amirite?

It's always “society’s fault” these days. Never about personal responsibility, or maybe just bad luck. Nah, gotta be some grand conspiracy by orange man bad or something. Gimme a break.

The Usual Suspects will be out in force any minute now, demanding more funding for…something. Therapy dogs for NBA players? Free avocado toast for grieving fans? Mandatory pronouns on jerseys? Who the hell knows. The grift never ends.

Meanwhile, real Americans are out here working hard, raising families, and trying to avoid getting canceled for saying the wrong thing. But hey, at least we can count on the media to milk this tragedy for all it's worth, right?

Watch the woke athletes take a knee now. Don't bet on it getting them into heaven though.

And you just know the left are going to demand mandatory vaccinations for all athletes now. Trust the science! Unless the science says something they don't like. Then it's misinformation. Doublethink is strong in this one.

Don't get me wrong, it's sad when anyone dies young. But let's not pretend this is some grand social injustice. Sometimes, life just sucks. It’s called entropy. Look it up, libs.

I'm sure Clarke was a decent guy. RIP, and all that. But can we please, for the love of God, stop turning every damn thing into a political football? It's exhausting.

Of course, they'll say this take is insensitive. That's the point, snowflakes. The world doesn't care about your feelings. Grow a pair.

Anyway, back to reality. Got bills to pay, gas prices are still insane, and Biden's still president. So yeah, life goes on. Someone put on some Skynyrd and crack open a cold one. We've got a country to save.

This is why nobody trusts the media. Everyone has an angle now. Where's the objective reporting? Oh right, that died a long time ago. The narrative must be pushed, at all costs. Facts be damned.