So, two Navy jets decided to get a little too close at an air show. BOOM! Instant fireworks, but thankfully, all four pilots ejected safely. Talk about an expensive oopsie. The libs will probably try to blame Trump somehow, but let's be real, stuff happens.

The Deep State probably sabotaged those planes. Or maybe it was Hunter Biden high on fentanyl, remote controlling the aircraft. I'm just asking questions! Either way, the important thing is our boys are alright. Thank God for ejection seats, am I right?

Of course, the Woke Left will be all over this, screaming about the environmental impact of the fiery crash and how air shows are a tool of oppressive militarism. They'll demand we defund the military and give all the money to Ukraine, because that's totally logical. Meanwhile, China's building an army of robot soldiers and planning to invade Taiwan. But hey, at least we'll have saved the planet from… fighter jet exhaust?

Speaking of China, did anyone check if the planes were made with parts from Wish.com? You know, those 'genuine' Rolexes and 'military-grade' tactical gear they sell for five bucks? Maybe Xi Jinping is playing 4D chess, sabotaging our military from within with cheap knockoffs. Wake up, sheeple!

Seriously though, the pilots deserve a medal. Ejecting from a crashing fighter jet isn't exactly a walk in the park. They're the real heroes, not those virtue-signaling celebrities lecturing us about climate change while flying around in private jets.

And let's not forget the poor taxpayers who are footing the bill for this aerial fender-bender. Each one of those planes probably cost more than my house, my car, and my future therapy sessions combined. But hey, at least it's not going to gender studies programs, right?

The investigation will probably drag on for months, with endless reports and bureaucratic mumbo-jumbo. They'll blame it on everything from pilot error to sunspots, anything but the real reason: The Deep State is trying to distract us from the truth about Pizzagate. Just kidding… mostly.

In the meantime, I'm sure the military-industrial complex is already lining up to sell us even more expensive planes. It's a win-win for them, unless you're a taxpayer or a pilot who just had a really bad day at the office. But hey, at least we got some cool videos out of it.

So, pour one out for those fallen jets, and let's hope the investigation doesn't reveal anything too embarrassing. And maybe, just maybe, we can all agree that air shows are still pretty cool, even if they occasionally involve a little unplanned pyrotechnics.

Remember, folks: Support our troops, drink beer, and don't trust the government. And maybe invest in a really good ejection seat, just in case. You never know when you might need it.

This is what happens when you let the woke mind virus into the cockpit. Those planes were probably thinking about pronouns instead of flying. Sad!

The real question is: will the Navy still have a flyover at the Super Bowl?