DENVER — Lionel Messi, the Argentinian GOAT (Greatest of All Time for you normies), notched two goals for Inter Miami against the Colorado Rapids, triggering a fresh wave of TDS (Trump Derangement Syndrome) among the perpetually offended. The over 75,000 strong crowd in Denver showed that real Americans appreciate skill, not woke virtue signaling.

Another game, another win for Messi, and another reason for the libs to clutch their pearls. Remember when soccer was supposed to be the sport of the future? Turns out, it just needed a real star, not another lecture on social justice. The only justice is watching these trust fund babies cry when their participation trophies are taken away.

Let's be real, the Rapids were just a speed bump on the road to Inter Miami's inevitable MLS dominance. All thanks to a free market system that allows talent to shine, regardless of your pronouns or preferred pronouns. The fact that Messi is making bank while AOC still grifts off the taxpayers is just the cherry on top.

The woke sports media will try to spin this as some kind of victory for diversity and inclusion, but we know the truth: it's a victory for excellence. Messi didn't get where he is by kneeling for the anthem or whining about microaggressions. He got there by being the best at what he does. That's the American dream, baby.

So, while the leftists are busy boycotting everything that doesn't align with their agenda, we'll be over here enjoying the beautiful game. And if they don't like it, they can go cry into their soy lattes. Messi's goals are proof that excellence still triumphs over woke nonsense. Get wrecked, losers.