Brussels - So, the EU, that glorious bastion of unelected bureaucrats and virtue signaling, is having a moment over Israel. Turns out, even they can't agree on how much to wag their fingers at the only vaguely sane country in a region perpetually on fire. Their biggest trading partner? Yeah, that's Israel. But don't expect them to actually do anything concrete about it.

Historically, the EU has always been a master of the lukewarm take. They 'support' a two-state solution, which is basically like saying they 'support' world peace. Groundbreaking. Meanwhile, individual countries are free to cozy up to whomever they want, resulting in a glorious mess of contradictory policies. Good job, guys. Real unity there.

The hand-wringing this time is over 'Israeli aggression.' Translation: Israel exists and defends itself. Apparently, that's a problem for the perpetually offended. They want Israel to be nicer to the people who want to see it wiped off the map. Makes sense. For the EU, anyway.

Of course, some countries are still vaguely pro-Israel, mostly because they haven't completely lost their minds. But those countries are getting outnumbered by the woke mob within the EU, who see Israel as the ultimate oppressor. Never mind the actual oppressors elsewhere in the world. Gotta focus on the low-hanging fruit. You know, the ones who actually have a free press and a functioning legal system.

Meanwhile, the EU is falling apart at the seams. Brexit happened, nationalism is on the rise, and nobody trusts Brussels anymore. But hey, at least they're having a productive debate about Israel. Priorities, people.

Experts (lol) say the EU needs a 'coherent and consistent policy.' Right. That'll happen right after pigs fly and Hell freezes over. The EU is incapable of coherence on anything, let alone something as complicated as the Middle East.

The implications? Nothing. The EU will continue to issue strongly worded statements, Israel will continue to exist, and the world will keep spinning. The only real impact is that EU politicians can feel good about themselves for 'doing something' without actually doing anything.

So, crack open a beer, folks, and enjoy the show. It's another episode of the EU doing what it does best: being completely useless and utterly predictable. At least it's good for a laugh... or maybe a cry.