Dyson Hair Dryer Price Cut: Finally, Normies Can Dry Their Hair Like Influencers (Maybe)
The bougie Dyson Supersonic is finally on sale, but is it a genuine deal or just another way for elites to LARP as relatable?
Alright, folks, listen up. The Dyson Supersonic, that overpriced hair dryer your Instagram-obsessed sister has been drooling over, is finally on sale. Yes, the one that costs more than your used Honda Civic (okay, slight exaggeration, but you get the point) is now allegedly affordable. Cue the champagne socialists pretending this somehow solves income inequality.
Let's be real, the original price tag was a blatant flex. It was a status symbol for coastal elites and trust fund babies who think paying extra for a hair dryer makes them better than everyone else. Now they can all say they are ‘relatable’ because they bought it on sale.
Is this a sign the economy is collapsing? Probably. When luxury brands start slashing prices, it's usually because the apocalypse is nigh. Or maybe they are just preparing to release a new version that requires a monthly subscription. Who knows with these people?
The marketing hype around this thing is legendary. They claim it's 'revolutionary' and 'life-changing.' It's a hair dryer, people. It blows hot air. Unless it can also pay my student loans, I'm not impressed. The revolution will not be blow-dried. At least, I don’t think it will.
Now, the libs will probably spin this as some kind of victory for the working class. 'See? Capitalism works! Eventually, even the poors can afford luxury items!' Yeah, right. Meanwhile, they're still trying to figure out how to pay their rent.
Let's not forget where these things are made. Probably some sweatshop in China where workers are paid less than my dog gets in treats. But hey, at least you can have salon-quality hair while supporting global exploitation.
So, should you buy it? If you have more money than sense, go for it. If you're trying to impress your boyfriend's mother, it might be worth it. But if you're a normal human being with actual priorities, stick with the cheap one from Walmart. It gets the job done, and you can use the extra money to buy ammo.
Also, let’s not pretend that the elites are going to stick to hair dryers forever, they’ll want to control our water supply by next year, probably.
And remember, real beauty comes from within. Or, you know, from filters and Photoshop. Whatever works.
Maybe now that everyone has access to it, it's not as special and sought after. Is anyone going to flex on others for having the same product?
So the elites continue to play their games while we continue to watch, maybe the discount is a sign to get in on the action ourselves. Maybe we should have some fun.

