So, Patrick Bruel, the guy who made French women swoon back in the day, is now Public Enemy Number One? Quelle surprise! Seems like every month another celebrity gets dragged through the digital mud thanks to the perpetually offended #MeToo mob. This time, it's Bruel, 67, accused of doing the dirty with Flavie Flament back in the early '90s. She was, allegedly, 16; he was 32. Cue the outrage.

Bruel, naturally, is playing the victim card, posting on Instagram about how he's never forced himself on anyone, blah, blah, blah. His lawyer is even claiming that it was all consensual, which is about as believable as Biden’s cognitive abilities. Meanwhile, Flament is out for blood, and a feminist group is demanding his upcoming tour get the axe. Sounds about right. Tour stops are scheduled in France, Belgium, Switzerland, and Canada.

Look, nobody condones sexual assault, but this whole 'trial by Twitter' thing is getting out of hand. Thirty other women are now piling on, according to some website called Mediapart. Ten cases are being reviewed by prosecutors. At least one was dropped in 2020 for a lack of evidence. Hmmm... Suspicious, no? It's almost like these allegations only surface when there's a potential payout or a chance for fifteen minutes of fame.

But let's be real: it's not about justice; it's about virtue signaling and canceling anyone who dared to be a man before woke culture took over. Remember when Johnny Depp was persona non grata? Now he’s back on top. Give it a year, Bruel will be selling out stadiums again. Unless, of course, he refuses to bend the knee to the progressive overlords.

Don't get me wrong, I am not saying Bruel is innocent; all I'm saying is let the legal process actually play out. But let's not forget how quick the mob is to burn someone at the stake without any proof. It's a dangerous game, and it’s only a matter of time before the pitchforks come for someone you actually like.

French government spokeswoman Maud Bregeon chiming in about encouraging victims to speak out, even decades later, is just fuel on the fire. Of course, everyone deserves their day in court, but the damage is already done. His reputation? Toast. His tour? Probably canceled. His career? Hanging by a thread. Thanks, #MeToo.

So, raise a glass to the latest victim of the woke witch hunt. May his downfall be a lesson to us all: never become famous, and never, ever, be a man. Because in this day and age, you're guilty until proven woke.