Alright, listen up, buttercups. Before the WNBA became a haven for social justice warriors and performative activism, there was a time when it was about one thing: winning. And nobody did that better than the Houston Comets. 1997, baby – the year the Comets stuck it to the New York Liberty and claimed the first-ever WNBA title. That's right, back when women's basketball was actually watchable.

Remember when sports were about sports? Yeah, me neither. But apparently, there was a brief window when the WNBA wasn't trying to lecture you about your privilege or virtue signal to the Twitterati. The Comets were too busy dominating the league to care about that woke nonsense.

These broads were good, plain and simple. Cynthia Cooper, a name that should be etched in the Mt. Rushmore of women's basketball, was a stone-cold killer. Forget the participation trophies and feel-good stories; Cooper came to win, and she didn't give a damn who she had to step on to get there. 44 points in a single game? Yeah, she was that good. Fran Harris put it best: "She was just, like, Yeah, I’m the motherfucker!" You don't see that kind of raw honesty anymore, do you?

And let's be honest, the establishment hated them. They wrote them off as too old, too washed up. The 'experts' predicted they'd finish dead last. The Comets laughed all the way to the bank, racking up four straight championships and proving that experience trumps youthful exuberance every time. Take notes, snowflakes.

The ABL? The WBL? Who cares? They failed because they lacked the vision, the grit, and the marketing muscle to make it in the big leagues. The WNBA, backed by the NBA, had the resources to survive. And the Comets gave them a damn good reason to stick around.

So, raise a glass to the Houston Comets, the OGs of the WNBA. Before the kneeling, the protesting, and the endless woke pandering, there was a team that just wanted to ball. And they did it damn well. The WNBA returning to Houston in 2027? Great. Maybe they can learn a thing or two from the Comets on how to actually play basketball and leave the political theater to the drama queens on Twitter.

This ain't your grandma's WNBA. This is the Houston Comets, where winning was everything, and feelings were for losers. Remember it.