Alright, folks, buckle up. The WHO, fresh off their handling of the… gestures vaguely…thing… is now telling the various warlords in the Democratic Republic of Congo to chill out for a minute because, you guessed it, Ebola's back. Seems like the ‘catastrophic collision of disease and conflict’ is less of a surprise and more of a Tuesday in that part of the world.

Tedros Ghebreyesus, the guy who apparently still has a job, is jetting off to the DRC this week, probably to give everyone a stern talking-to. As of Sunday, we're talking about 900 suspected cases and 223 suspected deaths in the DRC, plus a few cases popping up in Uganda. So, business as usual, basically.

Now, the usual suspects are all involved. Eastern DRC is basically a playground for armed groups. The government sort of controls things, but mostly it’s a free-for-all. The UN humanitarian office says a million people are displaced. Great job, everybody!

And of course, the Ebola outbreak has kindly spread into the rebel-held zones, which are lorded over by the M23 group – allegedly Rwandan backed. Because when it rains, it pours, right?

Tedros, in his infinite wisdom, says that stopping this Ebola transmission ‘depends entirely on humanitarian access.’ He added, “Frontline workers are risking everything, while attacks on health facilities make tracking cases and their contacts nearly impossible. We cannot build community trust or isolate the sick while bombs are falling.” No duh, Sherlock.

The WHO’s response is apparently hamstrung by ‘the transient nature of many communities in Ituri’ – because, you know, people tend to move around when they're not being actively shot at. And of course, those pesky international aid cuts are making things harder. Can't have nice things when the globalists are pinching pennies.

Then there’s the World Vision guy, Philippe Guiton, who's wringing his hands about the children. 'Years of conflict have weakened community systems, and acute malnutrition has left many young bodies too fragile to withstand a virus as aggressive as Ebola.' Thanks, Phil, for that ray of sunshine.

But here's the kicker. Apparently, people are attacking health facilities because they want to release Ebola victims' bodies for burial. Why? Because tradition. And traditionally, they wash and touch the corpses, which, as we all know, is a fantastic way to stop the spread of a highly contagious disease. Darwin would be proud.