Okay, so Trump's heading to China to yap with Xi about…who knows, probably how awesome they both are. But get this: the Deep State pencil-pushers tagging along? They gotta leave their precious iPhones at home. That's right, folks, no more doomscrolling Twitter or thirst-trapping on Insta while in communist territory. They're going full Amish, digitally speaking.

Why? Because China is basically one giant, Orwellian panopticon on steroids. Bill Gage, some ex-Secret Service dude, straight-up says 'everything is monitored.' No duh. Theresa Payton, a former White House CIO, basically tells everyone to assume they're being watched at all times. Welcome to the party, pal! We've been saying this for years. Now the swamp creatures get a taste of what it's like to live under constant surveillance. Good.

Think about it: these are the same people who probably think government surveillance in the US is totally fine and dandy, as long as they're doing the surveilling. Now they gotta deal with the shoe being on the other foot. Delicious.

And it's not just government types. Suits from Apple, Boeing, Qualcomm, and BlackRock are going too, apparently. So, even the guys who make the gadgets everyone's addicted to are admitting they're vulnerable to Chinese hacking. The irony is thicker than AOC's skull.

They're even worried about charging their phones. Juice jacking? Sounds like some weird porn thing, but apparently, it's a real security threat. You can't even trust a USB port these days. The future is truly dystopian. So next time you hear some soyboy whining about 'muh privacy' online, remind them that the actual government officials are ditching their devices because China is so sketch. That'll shut 'em up. The families of Nelson Wells Jr. and Dawn Michelle Hunt plead for their release from Chinese prisons as Trump heads to the summit.

Honestly, maybe this 'digital detox' will do these people some good. Get them off their screens, force them to actually talk to each other, maybe even learn something about the world outside of their echo chambers. But probably not. They'll probably just complain about the Wi-Fi.

The upcoming meeting with China is supposed to discuss Russia and Iran, highlighting that the U.S.' relationship with China is still going strong. These digital precautions for U.S. officials serve as a solid reminder of the tension of that relationship.