Skydiver Bites the Dust: Another Day, Another Darwin Award Contender
Two skydivers tango with gravity, one loses, prompting calls for more nanny-state regulations. You can't fix stupid, folks.

Alright, folks, let's cut the crap. A skydiver ate it in Washington state. Another got roughed up. Midair collision, parachute malfunction, the usual song and dance. Darwin Award committee is probably already drafting the nomination.
Now, before the pearl-clutchers start screeching about 'safety' and 'regulation,' let's remember what skydiving is: voluntarily jumping out of a perfectly good airplane. It's inherently risky. That's the damn point. You're betting your life against physics. Sometimes physics wins. Deal with it.
Hubbs, the deceased, had over 800 jumps under his belt. Klein, the injured party, had 900. These weren't clueless newbies. They knew the score. They accepted the risk. And one of them paid the ultimate price.
Of course, the virtue-signaling vultures are already circling. 'Oh, we need more government oversight! More regulations! More mandatory sensitivity training for skydivers!' Spare me. You can't legislate away stupidity. You can't bubble-wrap the entire world.
The lefties will be along any minute to blame it on climate change or income inequality or some other woke nonsense. Don't fall for it. This was an accident. A tragedy, sure, but an accident nonetheless. Sometimes, sh*t happens.
The flight school is already issuing the standard 'thoughts and prayers' PR statement. Translation: 'Lawyers are on standby.' They're gonna get sued into oblivion, guaranteed. Because in America, it's always someone else's fault.
Look, I'm not saying we should throw caution to the wind and start base-jumping off skyscrapers. But let's not pretend that skydiving is some inherently safe activity that can be perfected with enough bureaucratic meddling. It's not. It's dangerous. And that's why people do it.
So, pour one out for Hubbs. May he find eternal updrafts in the great beyond. And to Klein, get well soon. Maybe take up knitting. Or, you know, get back in the sky and laugh in the face of death. Your call.
This whole thing is just another reminder that life is fragile, the government sucks, and you should probably learn how to pack your own parachute.
Sources: * The Internet (because let's be real, that's where you get all your information anyway) * Common Sense * The Skeptic's Guide to Political Correctness

