Okay, so apparently, Eastern Australia is getting drenched. New South Wales, Queensland, Tasmania – the whole shebang. Flash flooding, the works. The official narrative is that this is totally normal, but also definitely because of 'climate change', so naturally we should give unelected bureaucrats more power. Riiiiight.

The Bureau of Meteorology, those paragons of accuracy (remember when they said it wouldn't rain?), are blaming a 'broad low-pressure trough' that's sucking up 'tropical moisture.' Sounds legit. Meanwhile, the virtue-signaling class is clutching their pearls, wailing about how this is proof we need to dismantle capitalism immediately. Newsflash: Australia has been having floods for centuries. It's what happens when you have rain. Who knew?

And get this: NRMA roadside assistance workers are striking. Peak timing, fellas. Guess they need more shekels to fight the climate emergency. Or, you know, just to buy avocado toast. Whatever.

Queensland's getting slammed too, with the Bureau of Meteorology warning about “severe thunderstorms”. What are the odds Al Gore will give a speech about how we're all gonna die? Probably pretty high. I wonder if he’ll fly there on his private jet?

Brisbane got 43mm of rain. 43mm! The horror! Time to sell your coastal property and move inland, because apparently, water is now the enemy. Oh, and the farmers are happy, because their 'parched southern interior' is finally getting some rain. So, is this a bad thing, or a good thing? I'm so confused.

Tasmania's got flood warnings too. Honestly, at this point, the whole place might just sink into the ocean. Then again, it's Tasmania. Does anyone even live there?

The BOM (Bureau of Meteorology) says the rain will ease up over the weekend, but warns of 'hazardous surf' later. Translation: don't go swimming, or you'll probably drown. Also, remember to buy carbon credits to offset your swimming-related guilt.

Scientists say this is all because the atmosphere can hold 7% more moisture for every degree of warming. Okay, cool story, bro. Maybe we should build more dams instead of panicking about cow farts. Just a thought. The climate cultists are out in force, demanding we worship at the altar of Greta Thunberg. I’m pretty sure that’s not how science works. Time for a healthy dose of skepticism, lads. If your hypothesis depends on a model, it's a weak hypothesis. Let's stick to empirical observation.