So, OpenAI, the company that brought you the ChatGPT chatbot that replaced half of Twitter's content creators, just made a deal with the Pentagon. Yeah, THAT Pentagon. The one run by the lizard people, or at least the guys who still think Afghanistan was a good idea. Sam Altman, the guy who looks like he's permanently stuck in a TED Talk, swears up and down his AI won't be used for 'domestic mass surveillance' or 'autonomous weapons.' Sure, Jan.

First of all, who the hell trusts anything anyone says anymore, especially when they're talking about the military-industrial complex? This is the same crew that told us WMDs were hiding under Saddam's rug. Now they want us to believe they're just gonna use AI to... what? Make better spreadsheets? Come on, man.

Second, even if Altman is being honest (doubtful), the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Today it's 'data analysis' and 'threat assessment,' tomorrow it's Skynet nuking Moscow. You know, for 'freedom.'

Third, let's be real, 'domestic mass surveillance' is already happening. You think Facebook isn't working with the feds? You think your smart fridge isn't spying on you? This OpenAI deal just makes it official. Big Brother is here, and he's brought his algorithms.

And 'autonomous weapons'? Please. They're already working on those. Drones are basically robo-birds of prey. It's only a matter of time before they're armed and programmed to hunt down anyone who disagrees with the regime. Just ask Alex Jones. (Okay, maybe don't.)

So what's the takeaway? The machines are rising, the Deep State is winning, and your only hope is to stock up on canned goods and learn to live off the grid. Or, you know, just keep doomscrolling on Twitter. Whatever works.

But hey, at least we got some sick memes out of it, right?

Sources:

* Judicial Watch * Mises Institute