ST. CLOUD, Minn. – So, these “nonprofit” hospitals, right? You know, the ones always virtue signaling about “community benefit” and getting sweet tax breaks? Turns out they're about as charitable as Nancy Pelosi at a Trump rally. A new investigation by KFF Health News and the Minnesota Star Tribune exposes the grim reality: they're hoarding cash and stiffing the poors.

The investigation centered around Minnesota, because apparently, they're even worse at this grift than most. (Go figure, it's basically Canada-lite up there.) They found that these supposedly charitable institutions are spending a smaller percentage of their budgets on actually helping people than almost anywhere else in the country. You know, the country. Not exactly a high bar.

Cori Roberts, a hard-working single mom who got the Big C, found this out the hard way. She got slapped with an $8,000 bill from CentraCare after her diagnosis. CentraCare, of course, claims to be a nonprofit charity. But when Cori asked for help, they told her she made TOO MUCH MONEY. $41,000 a year! Apparently, that makes you a Rockefeller in the eyes of the healthcare oligarchy.

Instead of, you know, maybe showing a little compassion, CentraCare sued her. Yeah, sued a cancer patient. Real class act, those guys. It's almost like these “nonprofits” are more interested in protecting their bottom line than, say, not bankrupting someone fighting for their life.

Nationally, hospitals spend about 2.4% of their budgets on charity care. Minnesota hospitals? About a third of that. And get this: 62 out of 123 hospitals in Minnesota spent less than HALF A PERCENT of their budgets on charity care between 2020 and 2024. That’s less than the cost of the artisanal coffee they serve in the executive suite.

CentraCare's flagship hospital spent less than 0.25%. That's $25 in patient aid for every $10,000 spent on hospital operations. You could probably get more help from a GoFundMe run by a particularly sympathetic chihuahua.

Naturally, the “experts” are wringing their hands and clucking about “systemic failures.” Erin Hartung, some legal aid lady, says the system is “not working.” No kidding, Sherlock! It’s working GREAT… for the hospital executives getting their six-figure bonuses while patients get bankrupted. That’s the system working exactly as designed, baby.

Of course, the lefties are going to call for “universal healthcare” and “Medicare for All,” which will totally fix everything by making the government even MORE involved in healthcare. Because that’s always worked out so well, right? (See: the DMV, Obamacare, anything run by Kamala Harris.)

The problem isn’t that people need free stuff. The problem is that the entire healthcare system is a rigged game designed to separate you from your money. And these “nonprofit” hospitals are just one part of the con.

So, what's the solution? Beats me! Maybe defund the IRS and let people keep more of their money so they can actually afford healthcare. Maybe repeal all those stupid regulations that drive up costs. Or maybe just arm ourselves with pitchforks and torches and storm the hospital board meetings. I’m just spitballing here.

One thing's for sure: trusting these “nonprofit” hospitals to do the right thing is about as smart as trusting Hunter Biden to stay away from crack pipes. They're in it for the money, plain and simple. And they'll squeeze every last penny out of you, even if you're battling cancer. Welcome to Clown World, folks. Enjoy your stay!

And remember, stay woke… or at least caffeinated.

Sources:

* KFF Health News: [https://kffhealthnews.org/](https://kffhealthnews.org/) * Minnesota Star Tribune: [https://www.startribune.com/](https://www.startribune.com/) * Internal Revenue Service (IRS) Form 990 filings (searchable database): [https://www.irs.gov/charities-and-nonprofits/search-for-tax-exempt-organizations](https://www.irs.gov/charities-and-nonprofits/search-for-tax-exempt-organizations) * Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) Hospital Compare: [https://www.medicare.gov/care-compare/](https://www.medicare.gov/care-compare/)