Vientiane, Laos – So, get this: some villagers in Laos, probably lured by the siren song of Mother Earth or whatever, got themselves wedged in a cave. Lao and Thai rescue workers, bless their hearts, managed to yank one of 'em out. He even had a lamp on his head – probably bought it with that sweet, sweet foreign aid we keep sending over there. Two more are still kicking around in the dark.

Let's be honest: cave exploration? Sounds like a government-funded boondoggle waiting to happen. You just know some environmentalist egghead was telling these folks it was their duty to commune with the Earth or some such nonsense. And now, taxpayers are footing the bill for a rescue operation.

The media's all over it, naturally. Gotta virtue signal about how we're all connected and how climate change is to blame. But let's get real: caves are always a bit risky. And sometimes, people make bad decisions. It happens.

I bet if you asked those missing villagers what they would have preferred; cash assistance or cave exploration they’d pick cash. Just give ‘em the freakin’ money and let ‘em decide what’s best.

Of course, the international community is patting itself on the back for its humanitarian efforts. But where was this concern when they were bailing out banks? Or funding gender studies programs in Uzbekistan? Priorities, people. Priorities.

And don't even get me started on the woke corporations virtue signaling about their commitment to cave safety. Suddenly, every company's an expert on subterranean rescue. Give me a break.

Meanwhile, back in the real world, regular folks are struggling to pay their bills, gas prices are through the roof, and the woke mob is trying to cancel Dr. Seuss. But hey, at least we rescued a villager from a cave. Progress!

But hey, at least they didn't try to bring in a diversity and inclusion consultant to oversee the rescue. Small victories, I guess.

So, here's to the Lao and Thai rescue workers. May they find the other two villagers, and may they all learn a valuable lesson about the dangers of listening to virtue-signaling elites and playing in dark holes.

And remember, folks: the next time you're tempted to explore a cave, just stay home and watch Fox News. You'll be safer, and you won't have to worry about being rescued by the globalist elite.

Sources:

* CIA World Factbook * Mises Institute