So, some British dude named Jagtar Singh Johal got nicked in India, allegedly for crimes the perpetually offended legal establishment deems 'human rights abuses.' Now, a gaggle of graybeards – including Dominic Grieve, a name that probably makes your blood pressure spike – are demanding Keir Starmer, the human mannequin currently pretending to lead the Labour Party, intervene. Because apparently, we're supposed to care more about some activist in Punjab than the unholy mess our own country has become.

This Johal fellow, seems he was in India for his wedding, which is usually a happy occasion unless you're a groomzilla. His family claims he was snatched up by the local constabulary like a cheap takeaway, adding another layer of intrigue to the curry. The legal hand-wringers are claiming he's being tried twice for the same crime, a supposed violation of 'double jeopardy,' which sounds like a particularly annoying game show.

Turns out, some Indian court already acquitted him of terrorism charges, which should have been that, right? Nope! Now he's facing a whole buffet of new charges, all stemming from the same alleged confession, which his supporters claim was extracted through methods that would make Gitmo blush – electricity, fire, the usual. Seems legit.

The Usual Suspects – Helena Kennedy, Elish Angiolini, Geoffrey Robertson KC – also signed this whiny letter to Starmer. Like Starmer gives a toss about due process, dude probably thinks double jeopardy is some new gender identity. These folks are hoping their fancy titles will magically force Starmer to actually do something besides parrot woke talking points. Good luck with that.

The letter bemoans the supposed injustice, pontificating about international law and customary practices. Newsflash for the wig-wearing set: nobody cares. While they're busy clutching their pearls over this case, the UK is being overrun by unchecked immigration, crime is skyrocketing, and our freedoms are eroding faster than a sandcastle at high tide. But yeah, let's focus on some dude in India.

The UN – a bastion of virtue and reason, as we all know – has already declared Johal's detention 'arbitrary.' Of course they have. They probably think Boris Johnson is a fascist and that Brexit was a hate crime. The whole thing stinks of virtue signaling and globalist meddling. Maybe, just maybe, India has a good reason to keep this guy locked up. Maybe their courts aren't as easily swayed by the woke mob as ours are becoming.