NORMAL, Ill. – Oh, the horror! Those lazy bums at AFSCME Council 31, representing a whopping 350 ISU employees, are throwing a fit because the university dared to, gasp, hire temporary workers while they're out on strike. Apparently, according to these champions of the proletariat, this violates the state’s Employment of Strikebreakers Act. Which, get this, is a Class A misdemeanor… but also might be unconstitutional. LOL.

So, let me get this straight: these geniuses are suing because the university is trying to keep the lights on and the students fed while they're busy waving picket signs and demanding more shekels? Sounds about right. They want a judge to force ISU to keep their doors closed instead. The lawsuit is seeking an injunction to stop the use of temporary workers, claiming it causes “irreparable harm.” You know what's irreparable? A degree from a school that can't even feed its students because the food service staff is on strike.

These striking heroes, who apparently are the only ones capable of cleaning toilets and slopping mystery meat onto trays, claim that ISU hired five contractors to perform their oh-so-vital work. Four of those are cleaning agencies, suggesting the strikers are slacking off and not washing their hands after the bathroom.

The union, bless their cotton socks, claims they warned the university about this illegal activity. Because, you know, universities are just dying to break laws and get sued. ISU, of course, denies any wrongdoing and claims they followed all the proper procedures. Shocking.

Their strike started on April 8 because, surprise surprise, they couldn't agree on a contract. The university claims they offered competitive wages. The union, naturally, says it's not enough. This is the same circus we've seen since the dawn of unions. Maybe instead of suing, they should come in to work, contribute to society and increase production.

And let's be real, this whole “Employment of Strikebreakers Act” sounds like something straight out of the Communist Manifesto. It's designed to kneecap employers and give unions even more power. Imagine trying to run a business when your employees can just walk out and demand whatever they want, knowing you can't hire anyone to replace them. What a glorious utopia.

If a business cannot be profitable by offering good compensation and workplace rules, then maybe that business shouldn't exist. If labor can easily be provided by another qualified party at a lower cost, then the original party should consider improving their service and decreasing their costs.

So, where does this leave us? Probably with ISU settling to avoid a protracted legal battle, and the taxpayers footing the bill for the union's demands. Ah, the joys of living in a blue state where unions hold all the cards. Maybe next time, the university should just hire a bunch of illegal aliens. I'm sure AFSCME would love that.

In the meantime, I'll be over here laughing at the absurdity of it all, while simultaneously bracing myself for higher tuition rates to cover these shenanigans. Thanks, AFSCME!

This whole situation is a reminder that unions are not the saviors of the working class; they're just another special interest group looking to enrich themselves at the expense of everyone else. And in Illinois, they have a stranglehold on the state government.

So, next time you hear a union crying about being treated unfairly, remember this story. They're not fighting for justice; they're fighting for power. And they'll use any means necessary to get it, even if it means shutting down a university and screwing over the students. Classic AFSCME.