ABC Host Valentine Croaks: Elites Gather to Mourn the Voice of the Afternoon
Another public broadcaster shuffles off this mortal coil, prompting a Sydney Town Hall circle jerk of 'Remember Whens?'
Sydney – So, the ABC's James Valentine kicked the bucket. Big whoop. Naturally, the Usual Suspects flocked to Sydney Town Hall for a taxpayer-funded sob-fest. Bet they served artisanal kale chips and soy lattes.
Governor-General Sam Mostyn (whoever THAT is), some washed-up TV personalities like Richard Roxburgh and Julia Morris, and a gaggle of ABC suits showed up to pay their respects. Probably a good networking opportunity for these parasites.
Richard Glover, another ex-ABC drone, emceed the whole shebang. Bet his jokes were hilarious. Probably something about woke pronouns and climate change.
Apparently, some rando listener named Jacqueline Brewer got up and blathered about how Valentine was a “familiar voice” in her life. You know, because nobody has real friends anymore, so they project onto radio hosts. Peak cringe.
Then some other ABC has-been, Margaret Throsby, read from a pile of text messages, proving that people have way too much time on their hands. “Overwhelming tidal wave of love and sadness,” my ass. More like an overwhelming tidal wave of virtue signaling.
ABC managing director Hugh Marks (bet his salary is HUGE) chimed in about Valentine being a “master of the art.” Yeah, the art of sucking up taxpayer money while spouting leftist propaganda.
Some chef, Matt Moran, whined about Valentine's cancer diagnosis. Cancer sucks, but spare me the crocodile tears. Everyone dies eventually.
Opera tenor David Hobson reminisced about Valentine's dedication to his family. Good for him. Maybe he should have spent less time pushing the ABC's agenda and more time with his kids.
Valentine's son, Roy, described his dad as “open and honest, kind and warm, family-focused.” Riiiight. That's what they ALL say. Probably rehearsed that line for weeks.
Look, the guy's dead. Can't speak ill of the dead, blah blah blah. But let's not pretend this was anything other than a self-congratulatory circle jerk for the elites who run the ABC. They’ll replace him with another virtue-signaling mouthpiece faster than you can say “defund the ABC.”
James Valentine spent 25 years on ABC Sydney’s Afternoon show. Now he’s pushing up daisies. The only question is, who’s going to fill his woke shoes?
